Valentines Day 2002

[ornoth]

So Thursday was Valentines Day. When I'm seeing someone, it's usually a day like any other, with the added irritation that no one ever gets me much of anything, especially flowers. When I'm not seeing anyone (like now, having just broken up with Inna a couple weeks ago), it's about equally disappointing, but without any real consolation of at least knowing that someone does care.

So this year was about the same. Inna and I didn't contact one another, as is politically correct at this time, since we're both trying to be less than lovers or best friends for the other. It's complicated and ironic and disappointing, but I've been trying to put into practice some of the things I really believe about relationships, like not trying to hang on to something that my partner doesn't want, and trying to enable them to pursue their own happiness. So far it's working well, but it leaves me with half a feeling of great nobility and half emptiness and loss.

But we were talking about Valentines Day. I wound up netting three Valentine "occurrances". They were all of a "generic" nature, meaning they were obviously not anything where I was treated any better than anyone else on the street, but they nonetheless made me feel a little better on this somewhat bittersweet holiday. First, a coworker (and a cute one, too) gave everyone on our project team (which includes me) a small, cute card. Mine had cats on it, which was nice. Second, I had a cleaning at the dentist (an odd thing for Valentines Day, but that's just how it happened), and the receptionist gave everyone (which includes me) a single red rose. Finally, that night I went out to a club and saw Pressure Cooker, a great local reggae band, and a random Asian chick was walking up to guys (which includes me) and giving them candy hearts.

So you see what I mean when I say "generic": in no instance was I anything more than one person in a large class of people. I wasn't receiving individual notice, so it wasn't a meaningful occurrence. And yet those events were nice, and did help me get through the day. And that I guess is a pretty good thing to have had happen.